i feel at such a stand still at the moment. like life is just stuck, going by, but there are no readily open doors awaiting me, even though i may be knocking on several of them.
i focus a lot on the grace and love of God and oftentimes i am moved to tears because of this.
and within the same moment i could be utterly appalled at the thoughts that can cross my mind and the things that i have done that deserve such punishment, and rejection of being called His child, and yet, He chose me, His precious daughter, and not only that, continues to choose me and sing over me His love.
i am feeling so dull, just in a hard place, hard phase, hard stage. i doubt Him too much, yet He has never once failed me.